Friday, March 14, 2014
In the End, a Female Narcissist Destroys Only Herself
Female narcissists work differently than male abusers. They destroy their targets with gossip, lies, innuendo, calumny and detraction. (Detraction is the vile practice of revealing another's true faults, with the intent of making them look bad.) For instance, if someone had a period in their life where they did things they weren't proud of, but have since managed to turn everything around, someone who knew them before shouldn't dredge this history up, unless there's a very good cause.
Gossips tend to use detraction combined with calumny, which is an out-and-out false accusation. Including a bit of truth, along with their outrageous falsehoods gives their story more plausibility. Female bullies who use these tactics probably have a long history of tearing down others.
Even though most people are easily deceived, in time, their poisonous words will come back to haunt the unfortunate narcissist. Eventually, she'll be pegged as a gossip and a troublemaker. No one will want to be in her presence.
Those of us who realize that people who talk badly about others will also do the same to us like to give these destructive individuals a very wide berth. There is no upside to starting up a friendship with someone who treats others so poorly.
Flickr photo by puuikibeach